It has brought back memories… Another award from Sree. I guess I should in turn award him as the best blog-award buddy for showering me most awards in the past few months… (which equals to 3!!) The following star award reminds me of several things.

Reminds me of the small star rank badges I received in school, which in turn reminds me of the other badges like blue house captain, green house captain, NSC badge and all those things, which I always kept in my school bag, so that I do not forget to wear them the next day…

Reminds me of the colorful Christmas stars hung at our house, which my father and I used to take up as a project, which also reminds me of a brilliant(!) idea I once offered him, how to extend the electrical connection from inside a room bulb socket, and how I used to wonder at the patterned lighting that came through the holes in the star and lit the porch staircase, where I used to sit talking with my mom and dad while they strolled in front of the house…

Reminds me of the shining stars in the sky, which reminds me of the part in Kuch Kuch Hota hai, where the little boy counts the stars, and the metaphors related to the inability of counting the stars in the sky, and also of my dear moon, whom I gazed a lot from the balcony of house in Chennai, talking to him when I felt like talking to myself….

And last, but not the least, the evergreen song of which I liked the tune most rather than the words, making me remind of my stint with music in my life…
Twinkle twinkle little star,
How I wonder what you are
Up above the world so high
Like a diamond in the sky!

“Lucky hote hai woh jinhe zindagi mein doosra mauka miltha hai…”

Yesterday, on the fly, we got tickets for Rock On!!! And it was absolutely rocking. I don’t want to review it. I couldn’t view it as a film. It portrayed characters with some shades of mine, rather you, or everyone.

The film spoke of the rock band, Magik, which did live performances and created wonders. It spoke of the drift in life, in which they are carried away with the compromises of life. I too, rather ,each one of us has created Magik in our yesteryears. I don’t mean live performances or great music. But some magic moments. At various phases in my life. There were KD, Joe and Rob, Tanya and Debbie in many of those whom I met. There was the reminiscent Tea stall in the form of restaurants and other hang outs. There was even Sakshi amongst us, who tried to bring out the real “us”  from inside. And there were the drift aparts too. It has not been 10 years as in the film, but time has taken its toll already, and is dominating. Are we gonna miss the 10 years? Are we really satisfied with the way we live? Are we really happy? Are we being the real? What is it that we are lacking? What if, we don’t get a second chance unlike in the film? Or did we miss the second chance? What if, we are not lucky as Rob in real life?  Do we need to wait for another Sakshi and Devika to sprung up in our lives and take us back once again to recreate Magik? What’s pulling us back to take the initiative???

“..kab woh mera peecha chodenge?..”
“…jab tum unse bhaagna bandh kar dhoge…“

She came in to my life on a fine one day,
But I didnt knew, she came there to stay
We stayed together from then, for a reason,
But i didnt knew, there would be an end to the season.

I loved her round and cute pink face,
Which left me at times in a daze.
Many a times she combs her straight hair,
But as always, she gives up in despair.
I tried initially to convey, but in vain,
That she looked a beauty even in plain.

We travelled in Chennai and went round,
Sharing the old and creating new memories all around,
Being the bubbly and talkative she is,
I would always nod my head in every 2 mins.

We shared the bed and our secrets, but never crossed our path,
We did fight, but always in silent wrath.
But when i fell ill, she gave silently a pill,
And cooked rice, when she never did it before, even for a drill.

Many walked into our lives, and many went away,
But we both saw it through without much sway.
We were called man and wife by some of them,
And we never bothered to correct any of them.

As I stand wondersruck at God’s gift to me,
I wondered about both of our fate and destiny.
I am now forced to leave her there,
Not knowing when to meet her somewhere.

I could feel her pain of loneliness,
But dear, I am also devoid of happiness.
Though I have few friends and an elder sister,
They can never replace you at all, ever either.

I will always be happy at my fate,
To get such a wonderful first room-mate.
As time and life forbids, we met now with parting eyes
But as you said earlier, never ever say good byes…

The dreaded day is nearing… The day when I will have to leave Chennai… My home for the past 3 years.. People say I am gonna enjoy a new life in new environment and will be happy hereafter. But they won’t ever know one thing. How much I will miss Chennai, and its memoirs…

Every second passing by, I am trying to come to terms with the reality. Of my marital status and future life. The unknown heavy source asking me to brush off my past and asking me to move ahead in life. The same force which lashed onto me when I was forced to land in Chennai… But that time, things were different. I needed a change and was inclined to step into the world. I had very few friends and most of them were leaving hometown like me… So though the pain was there, I could sense it in everyone, and I could hear their silent prayers and vows in their minds to keep in touch…

But here, I am gonna miss something. Maybe the few friends left out whom I am gonna miss badly… very badly.. Or maybe the good moments we shared with each other with the whole gang… Or maybe the bitter experiences which taught me to face life… Or maybe the Chennai beach which always listened to me…

Words are short to pen down the memories which I treasure in the corner of my heart.. The innumerous people I met, some who came into my life and are still here, and some who have gone away already, the talks, the phone calls, the meets, the shoppings, the films, the getaways, the random musings, the feelings, the mutual understanding, the smiles, the tears, the conflicts, the pain, .. all seems to happen few seconds ago.. how time flies by….

I am gonna miss Chennai. But I have a long way to go. And all that I can do is to pray to myself and to ask the people I miss…
To join hands in preserving the sweet memories…
To strive hard to work out the sweet relation we share..amongst the various phases of life…
To take pains not to lose the closeness and the respect we share for each other as life is very short and the world is so dark..
To keep in touch…..

Moving along through the second year!! I remember how majestically I celebrated the first year!. And did I update the sent messages count as of now is 27000+.
And for the wish list, just few more got added… hmmm…

Finally it rained here. From past two days, the climate was cloudy here in Chennai. The drizzling rain and the cloudy atmosphere made Chennai beautiful, I guess it makes every city beautiful. The fresh water drops on leaves, the smell of the sand, the chilling wind, the watery road, with small small ponds, with the birds resting on branches shivering after the rain… And to sip hot coffee standing in balcony, with the “Suprabhatam” song in background in the morning, presents you with special freshness and warmth of a new dawn. Rain has always been integral part of my life, it has given me lot many memories and I am sure, it sends to many, along with me, an unknown shiver to the spine and leaves us in a blank expression to think of life.

There was a time, when in this rain, we used to go to schools in June with raincoats and umbrella, and with the worry of drenching the books and our school bag. And then there was the November rain, and the cyclone which unleashed restricting many of them to their homes. Be it June or November, it was a surprise to see the rain in Chennai always. Reminds me of the times when I used to stay in the Kelambakkam Ashram, spending time with friends singing and making noise, with chitchat, watching the boys playing football in the water pool in the rain. So many people under one roof. And there was another time, where I stayed at home, watching from the door, the rain splashing in front of the steps, going in dad’s bike with head down, to school, to meet friends rather than books n teachers, the roaming around in school during lunch time in the rain, with the fear of socks getting wet… And then there is another time, in which we slept cudddled in the afternoons, after lunch, while rain kept making sounds as if singing lullaby and wind blowing as fan… hmmm…

Gone are those days I guess… And with the time, the friends too… So much changes now. Lot many friends spread across the world, some whom we dont contact, though are nearby, books and bag changed to shoes and hair makeup, school and playground changed to companies, with no time even to pick umbrella. People are running fast in life, as individuals. The friendship bonds are now like threads, so thin, so worn out, connecting each other, but which can fade out with one strong wind and which will hang on to another, leaving memories behind…
Listening to song “Tanhayee” from “Dil Chahta Hai“….

sometimes, i feel life has been teaching me iin different ways different things. its going to be almost one year tat i have joined the CTS and working as software professional. Every day was a new experience to me. Sometimes i felt i am discovering myself, how i want to live life, how to enjoy, how to get along with others, how to live with yourself and many more. I even wondered why am i working like this in another state, just for money?
lot many things happening sometimies, and at times no movement at all. Are these silences just tea breaks during the sessions? I still wonder……